Sunday, November 30, 2008

Swiss drummers drumming

These sychronized drummers perform brilliantly at Edinburgh, Scotland Tattoo 2006.

More drums.

Travel articles to inspire and help you plan some spectacular local and foreign getaways.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o7k6VYGtm8g

Thursday, November 20, 2008

G. W. Bush Library to Open in 2009

The George W. Bush Presidential Library is now in the planning stages.
The Library will include:

The 'Hurricane Katrina Room', which is still under construction.

The 'Alberto Gonzales Room', where you won't be able to remember anything.

The 'Texas Air National Guard Room', where you don't even have to show up.

The 'Walter Reed Hospital Room', where they don't let you in.

The 'Guantanamo Bay Room', where they don't let you out.

The 'Weapons of Mass Destruction Room', which no one has been able to find.

The 'National Debt Room', which is huge and has no ceiling.

The 'Tax Cut Room', which allows entry only to the wealthy.

The 'Economy Room', which is in the toilet.

The 'Iraq War Room.' After you complete your first tour, they make you go back for a second, third, fourth, and sometimes, fifth tour.

The 'Dick Cheney Room', in the famous undisclosed location, complete with shotgun gallery.

The 'Environmental Conservation Room', still empty.

The 'Supreme Court's Gift Shop', where you can buy an election.

The 'Airport Men's Room', where you can meet some of your favorite Republican Senators.

The 'Decider Room', complete with dart board, magic 8-ball, Ouija board, dice, coins, and straws.

The museum will also have an electron microscope to help you locate the President's accomplishments.

How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb?


How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb?

1. Golden Retriever: The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned out bulb?
2. Border Collie: Just one. And then I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code.
3. Dachshund: You know I can't reach that stupid lamp!
4. Rottweiler: Make me.
5. Boxer: Who cares? I can still play with my squeaky toys in the dark.
6. Lab: Oh, me, me!!!!! Pleeeeeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can I? Pleeeeeeeeeze, please, please, please!
7. German Shepherd: I'll change it as soon as I've led these people from the dark, check to make sure I haven't missed any, and make just one more perimeter patrol to see that no one has tried to take advantage of the situation.
8. Jack Russell Terrier: I'll just pop it in while I'm bouncing off the walls and furniture.
9. Old English Sheep Dog: Light bulb? I'm sorry, but I don't see a light bulb!
10. Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark.
11. Chihuahua : Yo quiero Taco Bulb. Or 'We don't need no stinking light bulb.'
12. Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares?
13. Australian Shepherd: First, I'll put all the light bulbs in a little circle...
14. Poodle: I'll just blow in the Border Collie's ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.

How many cats does it take to change a light bulb?

Cats do not change light bulbs. People change light bulbs. So, the real question is:
'How long will it be before I can expect some light, some dinner, and a massage?'
ALL OF WHICH PROVES, ONCE AGAIN, THAT WHILE DOGS HAVE MASTERS, CATS HAVE STAFF!

Thursday, November 13, 2008

cat magnet


Anyone know where I can buy one of these?


More cats.    
Travel articles to inspire and help you plan some spectacular local and foreign getaways.

updated August 28, 2015
 

Saturday, November 8, 2008

the red binder


Notice To All Employees:
I have compiled a Master Reference binder for all staff. Inside this binder you will find 'solutions' to everyday problems. If you are having problems with photocopier, difficulty dealing with the staff or budgets, having computer problems, customer problems, personal problems, or any kind of problem, please come and get the red binder and it will help you through your issue.


Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Sunday, November 2, 2008